It’s never a good thing when a co-worker tells you they dreamed about you last night.
That conversation never quite happened because most of the people who I work with end up sleeping or at least napping during the day. So it went more like “I had a dream that you were in the other day.”
At any rate, the co-worker announced to my other co-workers that in her dream, I was dressed like a 20-foot chicken and was chasing her through the streets in her neighborhood. Apparently it wasn’t fun and games because I was throwing sharp stars on strings in an effort to take her out. Each time I’d throw the weapon at her she’d figure out how to avoid them. I was happy to hear about her defense.
To that end, I offered up these excuses why it could never happen in real life.
1.) I don’t own a 20-foot chicken suit. It wouldn’t fit in the elevator in my building. Not even in the freight elevator. Where would I store such a thing?
2.) I could never quite master a throwing star. I can throw a frisbee like a madman but throwing stars… not so much. I could never be Chuck Norris but no one else on this planet could be either. I guess Wham-O would have to manufacture my weapons. I’d hope they’d be the kind that glow-in-the dark.
3.) I don’t even know where my co-worker lives.
I apologized for her id’s opinion of me and reassured her it would never happen again.
Speaking of Chuck Norris and I know I was, I’ve been sporting a beard of sorts. I’ve gotten more positive comments than negative. I can’t believe the time it saves me every day. It’s like 10 minutes which translates into about an hour a week. You have to substract 10 minutes because I keep it trimmed up. I don’t want to look like Grizzly Adams.
I have a fair amount of red in my beard. It may look a little silly because I have brown hair. For now, I’m enjoying the extra hour that I can devote each week to different things.
Another one of my co-workers has a full-fledged beard. We figured he’s saved about a couple weeks of his life not shaving.
I’m just happy with the extra hour a week, I’ll take it.
Bock, Bock… just kidding…